One Month!

Our baby boy is a month old today. I'm not going to ask where as the past month gone- I know where it  has gone and I do not wish for it to be back.

I can still feel the weight of the emotions from 4wks ago and the weeks following. Looking back, I realize just how traumatic it was... on me. As selfish as that might sound, it's the truth. I can't speak for my man but I know it was pretty tough on him. He was/is my rock through all of this. He was the one who stayed the majority of the nights with Judah because I physically and emotionally could not, and he wouldn't have it :). He kept everything all together, and picked up the pieces when I fell apart, reminding me that God had this.

I'll never forget the thoughts going through my mind as the contractions kept coming closer and closer together. I wanted them to stop, I didn't want Judah to come out yet, I wasn't ready to hand him over to a team of doctors, to face the days ahead. When I was pushing, knowing it was that much closer to the hard reality of what was to come, I wanted to just stop. I was so overcome when I got to hold him for those few seconds. He was so perfect, some handsome, so BIG!! :) I couldn't stop crying, and didn't until about... July 1st.

I can still hear my voice, telling myself- breathe Jaimie, breathe Jaimie, breathe, Over and over again as I walked away from his bedside every time I had to leave. I'll never forget watching them take my little baby away on the big stretcher to surgery. I'll never forget Ben holding me and praying over Judah and me as they were getting him ready.

In everything, absolutely everything, God has gone before us and taken care of everything. From the move from Germany, our orders, doctors, nurses, traveling, hotels, financial situation, every small detail, God has been there and made his presence known. Judah is our praise, he could have no other name.

He is such a sweetheart, our little Judah cub. He's got the craziest hair, strongest arms and legs, and the sweetest  little growls and squeaks. He's also a fast learner. He went from all bottle feeding to breastfeeding in no time! He's starting to sleep a little longer through the night. Our longest was two nights ago, he slept 4 hours- then ate like he hadn't had anything to eat in days!! :) He's currently quite the Momma's boy, and I'm okay with that!

Some Judah Stats:

Eye color: the newborn gray/blue

Hair: pretty sure it's going to be a shade of red

Feeding: breastfeeding anywhere from every hour to 2 hours. Sometimes 3-4 through the night

Activity: He's got some great periods of awake time where he is so alert. One of those times is about 0430-0530.... I know.

Weight and Height: 11lbs, and we'll have to be a little late on the height...

Biggest Fan: Audrey.

At first I was so scared. I kept thinking, how in the world do Mom's do this two kiddo thing and the multiples that come after? Granted, I was still extremely emotional and still trying to process though everything that had just happend, not to mention running on about 4 hours of sleep. It's starting to look more like a possibility now. My Mom has come out three times and without her- I don't think it could have been possible. She dropped everything to come out and make sure she was there when I delivered. She took the last week off of school, used up her days to be here- just in case I went a few days early and so someone could be there with the wild woman. She left everything in her office at school, everything at home to come and help us. She kept Aud while we were in the hospital, encouraged me while Judah was in the hospital, and made things better- only like a Mom can. When Judah was readmitted and I got another infection the day before he came home, she dropped everything again and drove out. Then she came back again to help when I needed her again. God has blessed me with one amazing Mom.

We still can't believe we have been blessed with the priveledge of being Audrey and Judah's parents. All we can say is thank you Jesus for our babies and family.